It is no secret to myself that I possess the gift of mercy. What has been a secret, up until recently, is how that gift gets used and how it often controls my behavior without intention. What I mean is that I am so quick to respond with words of mercy to those who are feeling pain or discomfort. Sometimes before thinking I am trying to rescue people from what ails them.
This can be a strength or a weakness. I have seen God use this gift to encourage others and to help them to help themselves. When it becomes dysfunctional or potentially co-dependent is when I start to feel the weight of others pain and spend too much time trying to “fix” others. It can also be less than helpful for the recipient of my “fixing” especially if they are someone who is looking for a savior.
What I am learning is that people need to help themselves and at just the right time they will. However as long as there are “fixers” in the world they have the potential to actually get in the way of people taking responsibility for themselves and seeing the strength that lies within them.
I am learning, however slowly it may be, to pause when I feel the all-consuming emotion of “fix” come over me. I am learning to quietly pray and ask God how, if at all, that He wants me to assist. Honestly, I love people and want to help them so it will remain 2 steps forward and 1 step back as I learn to balance the strengths and weakness’ of my gift.
